The "What I Did for Christmas" List

1. 12th Street Lights in Austin with Zoey and Loretta
2 Riverwalk dinner, lights and swanky drinks at St. Anthony's with Diane
3. Baked 5 dozen cookies
4. Went to 5 parties (Jed, Alecozay, Dawn, Peg, and Work)
5. Saw Avatar with Eric in San Antonio
6. Pho noodles in Carrollton with Eric
7. Saw the Rockettes in Grapevine with Mom
8. Spent the day with Deanne, Brent and sweet baby Allen.
9. Spent many moons with Gma at her house watching CSI and Medium
10. Worked on my scrapbook
11. Made a snowman from the 3" of snow that fell in Dallas

Fun, fun, fun! Oh yes, I did NO work and had a WHITE Christmas!

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

The Girls: Pix for the Season

Cita poses on the couch, Mitzie makes her plea for medical funding and Zoey rides in the car with the window down!

Christmas List 2009

This year Christmas is a bit harder to make a list for. There are the things that are un-buyable, like Mouser's Health, but none that are small and simple. So, I am making a list but most of all I would like help paying for my senior dogger as she battles the disease ahead. At Mom's Request:
Money for Mitzie's Medical Care
My UT Class Ring
Money to get the other tree taken down

I know all are hard to give and money centered, but it is what I need and what would really help.

Parties and Cute Boys

I went to TWO parties this Saturday and had the best time.

Party #1 was a guy I had never met, but was set up with through his mother. She met me whilst I was buying a chair from her off craigslist. She stood in the parking lot where we met to exchange money for chair and invited me to the birthday/graduation party of her son. Weird I know! Because I had his email from the responses about the chair, I emailed him to check the water about attending. We've been emailing for 2 weeks. Of course, now, after the party, I am waiting to hear from him...But Anita and I went to the shindig and had fun drinking bear and talking to his friends and family. I thought it might feel weird, but actually it was quite fine. I think he is cute!

Party#2 was an invite through my gynocologist. I know. I am just trying to be more open so a man kind fall into my life! So, in that I received this party invitation. When I told a San Antonio native friend of mne about it, she was impressed. Evidently these are special invites to a special elitist party put on by the fabulous of San Antonio. It was awesome. Out on a ranch in south San, it was a-light with lights when we walked up at about 9. I had come home from my first party and changed for a black-tie affair and switched dates. This time Loretta came. Decked in our finest, we danced, drank and watched the people party on. Of course, this new found doctor of mine kept asking if I had, "found my new husband," but still it was completely a blast. I think he is Lebanese or maybe Armenian so the food was strange and wonderful (about 15 birds(turkeys and chickens) on platters of lettuce). But the most fun was watching the belly dancers come in and take the dancing stage. The home was like a palace, huge ceilings and massive. We danced and had a fun time. A student saw me and came over. HE asked, "Dr. Wilson? How did you get in here?" Loretta and I were one of maybe 6 White people. I said I knew people in high places. He smiled. I guess his wife works for the Doctor. It was such fun and beautiful and great.

Most of all, I am proud of myself that I went. I was SO exhausted. It is tiring to go to parties where you know no one and have to forge alliances. I had to do it twice! and in heels!

Loretta and I running the Turkey Trot in Austin: 5 MILES!

They Come in Threes...

I have heard that bad things, especially deaths happen in threes. So, since my grandpa’s death in June (29th), let’s just say I have been aware. In October, MitzieMouse was diagnosed and her life cut short. Now I spend mornings feeding her Gerber Graduates one by one. In the evening, I chase her around with a baby spoon putting globs of dinner-dinner on her pallet near her head, praying that the enticing aroma of liver diet food and medicine will waft to her nose and she gobble it. I put it with chicken, bologna, other dog food, trying vehemently to not use too much extra meat, but get her to eat. Death #2 is coming and I am watching it slowly, just like grandpa. My heart is dying too.

Now, I am wondering if I am watching another death: the death of my life as a smart and friend-full person. I have found myself stuck here in San Antonio, watching my Austin friendships fall apart as I wrangle a job I don’t like and that doesn’t like me. The idea of traveling the world has died with my choice to buy an unsellable house in a place that forsakes dogs and cats. Myself as smart person died with my purchase. There is no research here, no time to read and think. No room to be smart again. It is dying. So too has one of my most dear friendships begun to decay and die. It is sputtering, lifeless, not fun, and has plummeted from someone that knew everything about me and who was there for me in the best and worst of time, from conversations with much to say and plans to be had, to nothing. There is nothing to say, nothing to share, no real connection. There is empty space and nothing in common anymore. I must figure a way to be okay with that. There is no other option. You can’t make something live that is dying. You just watch it die.

I am experiencing two deaths at the same time, slowly and unstoppable. #2 and #3.