Sleeping

My bed and my sleeping pills are driving me nuts. My bed hurts my back. The taco spot is directly in the middle and where some tacos (okay, most tacos) are yummy, this one sucks. The sleeping pills the doctor gave me to help me sleep, do just that: they help me sleep. Now, without them, I am awake and it is 4am. Ive been "in bed" since 12 tossing and turning, waking, getting an ice pack, taking Tylenol, taking a coveted back-spasm pill,moving the dog to the floor, moving the cat to the floor, pacing, getting an ice cream sandwich, and now, blogging. I am about to buy a fucking temperpedic, $2,0000 bed and say, "The hell with it." Maybe playing "hunt for the best price online" will make me feel better. Now I am laying in bed with like 5 pillows propping me up. Maybe I'll be a zombie for Halloween.

Enough bitching-no, wait, one more thing. My face broke out on Thursday and I have giant, red zits exploding from my chin, forehead, and under my nose. To top off the pain and sorrow from that, they are the "pop and re-pop kind." Poor me.

On a more pleasant note, and mow that I got all the bitching out, I went to California this weekend. Yes, I jetted to LA for 48 hours. It felt like deja vu when I hit the Austin airport. For my birthday (which is Thursday) Diane gave me a companion pass to fly with her when she went to LA. Double fun. I got to see Jody AND I got to sit talk with Diane for 3 hours each way. I miss them both. So, I drove to Austin on Friday morning and the crack of dawn and dropped the mutts off at Aunt Wretta's. Diane picked me up and we hurriedly parked her purple car in the $7 lot and caught the parking lot bus to the departures. It was one of those, "Hurry, the bus is leaving and we are late" moments, only to arrive at the bus and it is on break. You know the kind. I graded horrible edpsych papers the whole way and Diane did crosswords. Once we got there, Diane rented a car to go to her sister's in Santa Monica, I hitched along and Jod met us there as we arrived-literally. As Diane and I pulled up to her little sister Josie,s, Jody was there with her ever attached GPS. Leaving Diane, we went to Venice beach to eat and walk the boardwalk. 2 hours of talking about everything from politics to her baby tooth, we walked the lively beach, never really getting in the sand and instead settling for noticing the people and the beach homes. I love architecture. That night I had a horrible stomachache from the mass amounts of food we ate and lunch and Jody had been up since 4:45 so we made like old people and splayed out watching her 37'' television. On Saturday, we went to an Italian street fair where we sampled pizza and ravioli, pesto and gelato. We even saw the pope carved from wood. Is it wrong to call the Pope Woody? After walking Hollywood Blvd. and Jody internally thinking the car was stolen, we headed to Melrose Ave where neither of us bought a damn thing. You know I still wasnt totally feeling well as one of the shoe places offered us 50% off and I still coulndt find a damn thing that I wanted-and they were nice shoes. No Fluevog-no nuttin. Trader Joes (which we need in Austin so badly) and wine, and cheese and great chatting, we ended the evening with the first season of Dexter. Well, I did. Jody fell asleep after one episode and I watched close to 4. HE is so cute! How can a murderer be so damn cute? I was on the floor at this point because that is when my back began the spasm. In the morning we went to my favorite coffee shop, Aroma Cafe, in Studio City to meet Diane. It was a Sunday so the masses were out with their puppies and the weather was perfect. I was jealous that Jody was going to stay and work some after Diane and I left. Left we did. I graded, she crossworded. Season premiere of Dexter at Loretta's upon my return and the most yummy meatloaf made at my request. Who would have ever thought that meatloaf would become a favorite meal? Meat and Loaf together in one brilliant pan...I could almost puke thinking about the raw meat...and then, the image switches to the taste. Delicious. Loretta is the bomb-bigity cook. I drove to San Antonio at 10. The end.

"I work my a&^ off, Jeff!"

Work: Found out today that we have a new, revised, budget for travel-for the jet-setting conferences that they want us doing. $2000. Now, I am not saying that is something to shun, but it is a problem when they tell us today, after we have worked our asses off to get the proposals in, to do reviews, and to be accepted. It's too late. They need to pay for the work we did. I shouldnt have to choose after I was told I could go. It doesnt seem fair.

Home: Last Friday my work threw me a housewarming-actually the new hire (who is lovely and sweet) did most of the work, including buying decorations (it was a Morrocan theme with throw pillows and candles all over). It was a fun time with much alcohol (maybe too much for me) and most everyone from work. Come 5, I was worried because no one was here. Then, everyone in a little house-with much food. I think the party ended at 11, and I was left to clean up crock pot cheese in the morning. I cant wait to have my favorites back!

I head to LA to visit my best buddy Jody Friday, just for the weekend. Now, I must take Zoey to the park. Hope she doesnt eat a duck!

Mitzie Mouse Tells It From Jail

So, for those of you that "got in," through the metal detectors and around the bend. My blog had to go incognito as my chair found it, read it, and made a joke about it! So, it is all ephemeral now. Like real life, you see me and then you dont.

As for work, classes are crazy and for some reason this semester, I am funny. I cant seem to stop making jokes as examples! It is weird. I am beginning to balance but it will again increase on Monday when I have to add in the field based portions.

On the home front, it is animal central. Mitzie is mad most of the time, upset, and walks around with her head down. She bites at Zoey if she gets too close. Zoey is non-stop energy. I walk her 2 miles in the morning and ride my bike while she runs for another 2 in the evening. Still, she is hyper. Woosh. On Thursday she goes to doggie daycare, has a special young girl hired to drive her home, feed both, walk both, before I come home at 10:30. Should I let her go another day?

People from work put together a house warming for me on Friday. Im nervous. As I have been dealing with all this depression, I am more interested in being alone. I like to walk the animals and think, zone with the TV, work around the house on little tasks...I dont want to have to be "me." Im not sure who she is but I have to play her.

How can you stay mad?

I'm scared, are you?

What does matter about Palin? What it tells you about McCain.

Here I’m echoing an emerging consensus, but I think it’s basically right on. First, there are reports appearing now that McCain himself, as well as Lindsay Graham, had been pushing for either Ridge or Lieberman as the running mate, but they were daunted by opposition from anti-abortion Republicans to either choice. If this is true, this tells you that McCain isn’t going to be able to govern as a “maverick” or independent. He’s the nominee, it’s his campaign to run, but he doesn’t feel able to do what he wants.

Second, look at what he does when he’s up against difficulty or opposition: he does something which is wildly impulsive, with almost no planning or forethought. The one thing you could say about the invasion of Iraq is that there was a lot of planning that went into the intention to invade: the evidence now suggests that the Bush Administration came into power with a possible attack on Iraq at the top of their wish list, well before 9/11, and were quick to execute that plan when the opportunity arose. In the current global and domestic situation, I really don’t want someone in the Oval Office who comes up against a difficult and confusing situation and says, “Fuck it, go drop some paratroopers over there. No, I don’t want to do scenarios and planning, I just want to do it. Go.”

The more details about Palin that come out, the more it becomes clear that she is an appalling choice to be a vice-president for a President who has a reasonable chance of becoming ill or dying in office. And the more it becomes clear that the McCain campaign scarcely bothered to vet or review her as a choice. This is another reason why politically no one should talk about her family or personal choices, because there are plenty of other issues. But chiefly, it all comes back to McCain himself, and what this says about the kind of decision-maker he would be as President.Oh yes, and let's make a pregnancy pact and not tell anyone the outcome for 7 months. Whose in?

Who is this person?

called ME. I think I have multiple personality disorder. I am Jen to friends when they are happy with me and Jenny when they are trying to be more formal. I am Dr. Wilson when I am rebelling, talking my heart out, teaching those out there to think and act; I'm Jenny Wilson when I am not seen, ubiquitous, and common. I am Mom to a variety of deities. I am someone that I don't recognize sometimes, a person with traits I've never seen, and a person with talent and skill I've never experienced. I am someone with good fashion sense and someone with the worst weekend-wear coined. I am a daughter who is bored by the complacency and whose family lives Norman Rockwallian cerebrally. I am a sister who loves her brother, hopes for his success beyond belief, but is scared for the lives of all of us involved. I am a best friend, to whom I don't know, but to someone. I am a grand-daughter who washes the feet of her grandpa and takes her grandma to drink a margarita, in a most dedicated and holy way, wishing they could live forever and ever, amen.

Wow-that is deep. Maybe this blog should just have daily activities...oh, then it would be: slept, walked dogs, ate, worked, ate, walked dogs, slept, walked dogs, ate, worked, ate, walked dogs...you get the idea.

Fist-In the Desk

One of the most embarassing moments ever-

The Shit Tornado

So, I just got home from a 12 hour work day and the house was full of the heavy aroma of shit. Little Zoey Scooter was left in my bedroom, door shut but able to roam inside freely. Why was she free? Because I felt bad about having her in her little kennel for 12 hours. So, I left her out. When I came home, Mouser was happy and jumpy and excited. She seemed her old self (no pun intended) until I asked her if she wanted to go get Zoey. She looked at me like, "No, not really." Opening the door, there was Zoey, tangled in my bra (which was hanging on the door nob). She had it hooked on her all day and proceeded to shit and walk in it all day, back and forth. It was a shit tornado. She had to have a bath it was so bad. I think I am done. Mitz is upset, Carmencita is ready to pack and move out, and I am tired. I think she is going to go stay a bit with Aunt Loretta and see if she can help us. Otherwise, I think I will have to let her go. I think I will cry if I have to. Is sending her to Aunt Wretta like sending an unruly child to her dad?

Work is busy-too busy. Im overwhelmed and trying hard and I am afraid by the time I get to my 17pm-10pm class, my neurons aren't firing and I am mush. I didn do a very good job tonight, even though I was ready, had read, and planned.

Lastly, I am adding some pictures of the dog and my house...There you go Mom!

I worked hard all weekend until I just had to say stop. Only a couple things got done, but it was the best I could do. Everything seems to take longer than I thought. Even this case of the hiccups is resisting my plea to finish already. I did the strands for the National Drop Out Committee, Read Anita's thesis, read some for the assessment class. I didnt work out but I didnt watch TV either. I worked and the list should be longer, I must find time to write for me. Where is that time? I think I need to make my life busier. I was so productive when I was busy to the max. Is that what I need? I think I am going to volunteer at the SNIPSA place or the humane society or something.

Tomorrow I will load up Mouse and Zoey and head to Austin, returning with just one dog. I feel the tears and lonesomeness coming. Ive definitely caught my mom's disease. Carmencita the cat is the only one who is fine with Zoey going. Blow the foghorn!