I went with Diane to see Beaches at the Paramount. Such a wonderfully made film that still makes me cry. Friendship is weird that way. When two people are so close they know everything about the other, it is so easy to love and so easy to be mean to each other. That movie's relationship between Hillary and Cece reminds me of my relationship with Diane. I had not thought about the parallels. I adore her and know her memory is long. I'm counting on that.
I just am so thankful for the friends I have. I am lucky to have wonderful friends. Sometimes I forget that I am surrounded by people who love me, people who want to spend time with me, who want to be a part of my life. If I could just feel that on the days that I am in the depths of despair. Thank you Diane, Loretta, Shelley, Dora, Dawn, Anita, Karen, Jody, Beth, Peg, Sherry, Eric...in no particular order. Thank you for knowing me and loving me despite and in spite of myself.
Today was interesting that way. I met my friend Dawn for lunch at Central Market and had a wonderful time talking about life and teaching. She is just great. The thing that was so interesting about the conversation was that I commented that I didn't think a professor was the job for me, that the politics, the drama, the writing, the angst did not fill me up, did not make me feel spent. Instead that guilt, and tiredness, and angst plagued me. Her advice? Get a new job. Then, there was the movie, which had the same repose, "Do what you love, life if short. Don't have regrets." Yeah, that is interesting, isn't it? What would I do? I only know teaching. I only know reading. Something to think about though.
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